Plucky Survivors See Europe

How does one plan an 8,000 mile road trip through Europe?  Hint: high blood pressure and tears are involved.  Follow along as I get ready for the grand adventure.

I go to the airport and the universe explains to me that no matter how carefully you plan, there is always something that can go wrong.

I go on a tourist blitzkreig of Berlin, hitting museums, memorials, and more.  Oh, and apparently I want people to get off my lawn.

Some surprise street food, some weird art, some optical illusions, drag queens on stilts, and the HOFF.  Berlin is not disappointing.

A ridiculous amount of walking took me all over Berlin to discover multiple outdoor markets, lots of food, my Berlin souvenir, and a few oddities.  Oh, and then there’s the musical about a brick.

A fairly lazy day that involved laundry, packing, and some really good food plus some observations about Berlin before I hit the road tomorrow.

Torrential rain scuttled most of my plans but I still managed to get in a few offbeat museums, some good Czech food, and a visit to a Prague casino.

Exploring Lesser Town, storming the castle, seeing a variety show with LOTS of variety, and climbing 207 steps.  Yes, 207.  I counted.  And nearly died.

A day of exploring Vienna including a visit with some butterflies, a place where they filmed an action movie (aka the National Library), and an entertaining show.

I have one of the most truly remarkable days in Vienna as the city celebrates Pride and I get a special rooftop view of the entire thing.  Don’t miss the pictures!

I explore Venice, take a terrifying boat ride, have two fantastic meals, visit an opera house, and more.  Check it out!

I find myself in the middle of an action movie as I discover what driving in Italy is really like.  Then I make it Milan and manage to knock out a few of the must-sees.

I manage to survive driving in Rome – no easy feat – and then go to a weird horror movie museum and take in the usual sights while battling the heat and crowds.

A morning spent visiting iconic sites, museums, and markets and an afternoon spent in the air conditioning without any shame.  It’s freakin’ hot here, people!

The heat wins and I take most of the day off, but I still managed to get in a little sightseeing and a lot of food, some of which I cooked myself!  I made pasta in Rome!

I take a drive up the Italian coast and make a pit stop to see what that whole Leaning Tower thing is all about. Then it’s on to Genoa where I receive multiple indecent proposals.  Read all about it.

A relatively uneventful day as I drive from Zurich to Dijon and then find it too hot when I get there to do too much.  I did have some gingerbread from a 200+ year old maker of it!

A trip through the French countryside leads me to Paris, where I find more driving drama, the Eiffel Tower, an incredible light show, and more heat.

I learn a lesson about how bad the American health care system is, then have a smoke (or visit a museum about it) and see if “Authentic Kansas City BBQ” is any good in Paris.  Hint: it’s not.

Another day in Paris as I immerse myself in the wonderful world of phonographs, pay homage to “Hacks,” and catch a show at Moulin Rouge.

I stand in lots of lines and eventually make it to London where I promptly fail at food, win (a little) at a casino, and listen to the England version of Times Square out my window.

In which I experience the UK healthcare system first hand but get some good news as a result and then go see an immersive dinner show, but not the one I had tickets to

As perfect a day as one could ask for with a bunch of offbeat museums, incredible street food, and perfect weather.  I love London.

I do a little shopping and not just because it’s London Pride day and that’s what my people do.  Then I see the parade, some entertainment, and lots and lots of rainbows.

I cross three countries – England, France, and Germany.  Oh, and PluckyMobile really needs a bath.  That and some ruminations on the halfway point of the trip.

PluckyMobile got a bath and was all shiny for a visit to the Volklingen Iron Works, a UNESCO World Heritage site packed with art.  Then, on to Stuttgart!

I learn more about bread than I wanted to, visit a Christmas museum for inspiration, crush hard on Salzburg, and deal with a less-than-plucky PluckyMobile.

I lose almost an entire day as I deal with the car, a crucial part of any road trip, but still manage to get a little Munich in with a beer museum and a magic show.

A long day of driving but some of the most incredible scenery I’ve ever seen.  Then I get seduced by Lake Como and never want to leave.

A lot of very pretty driving and some not so great traffic causes me to have to shift my plans for what I wanted to do today, but I did make it to Monaco to get my James Bond on!

I stop at a couple of off-the-beaten track museums and actually get inside of one of them.  Then it’s on to Montpellier for a night of rest, relaxation, and work.

I visit the ninth country of the trip when I cross into Spain and head toward Barcelona.  Once there I enjoy a rooftop bar, go see some smut, and catch a drag show.

A combination of events keep me from exploring Barcelona as much I would have liked, but I still caught the Pride Parade and made a visit to another Gaudi masterpiece.

A bird crapped on my hat and Spain won the World Cup.  That’s about the extent of my update for the day, but feel free to get all the gory details anyway.

One of my longest days of driving on the trip takes me from the vaguely familiar, and kinda boring, parts of Spain to the dramatic and beautiful Costa del Sol.

I explore a couple of cities on the Costa del Sol and find myself a little disappointed, but still found some fantastic food and saw a really great show.

I continue my journey through Spain by falling in love with Seville where I immerse myself in Flamenco and get some hidden nun candy.  That will make more sense if you read this.

I spend the day exploring Seville, from the Old Town to the Jewish Quarter to parks and palaces and neighborhoods galore.  Walk along with me, won’t you?

I walk much more than I should have but saw some fun things including an interactive earthquake attraction and a creative hub fashioned out of old industrial buildings.

I try to go see some sick dolls but wind up storming a castle instead.  And by storm I mean take a taxi up the hill and buy a ticket.  There’s only so much I can do at this point.

I get out and explore Porto with a very special tour of the world’s most beautiful bookstore, a visit to a local market, and and odd shopping mall.

My final day in Porto provides me with some of the most incredible views of my visit here, more than a little height anxiety, and an incredible show with the best magician in the world.

I break Google Maps by driving on a road that it thinks doesn’t exist, then make it to La Rochelle for some beautiful views and good food.

I am whisked away by the 24 Hours of Le Mans, I am charmed and surprised by the city of Le Mans, and I get into a fight with a French woman in a McDonald’s parking lot.  Just another day.

I take the obligatory photo of Mannequin Pis, I visit a Belgian Fry museum, a Belgian chocolate museum, and have Belgian waffles for lunch.  Have I mentioned that I’m in Brussels?

It was a day of “lasts” – last load of laundry on the road, last day of driving, last day in PluckyMobile 2, and the last hotel of the trip… in Amsterdam!

I come down with a cold but soldier on with some incredible street art, some digital art, and a march along with a hundred thousand or so of my closest gay friends.

Another big museum day with visits to collections about marijuana, prostitution, pianolas, and Nazi persecution of the Jews.  I like to keep things thematic whenever possible.

The trip home, the trip in numbers, and my thoughts about what it all meant.